Wednesday, May 18, 2011

New chapter of life

NO matter how strong u are, i will be twice as stronger than you

when my mind is overflowing with thoughts just now, its just so funny that my mind is blank now..

my biggest enemy is not u, not anyone..but myself..
i wanna apologize for that has caused suffering for those who love me and loveD me before..

Sometimes i am heartbroken in a way that i have never experienced before, sometimes i am relieve in a way that i wonder should i feel that way..
but i am sure that this is the best solution as i too do not want to waste your time any longer and thanks to u that even though i have lost a great chunk of my heart, but i have indeed gained freedom..(same to u)

Sad to say, it is as though a great big black stone that had been subsided in my heart throughout this one year had finally been lifted from my heart..

Can feelings of one year be gone in just one week? or perhaps five days? well..i truly do not think so..however time will heal everything..God will enable time to reinstore the feelings thats meant to be felt by our heart and also vanish feelings that shud not be felt by our heart anymore..so just let time do its work..

To say that everything has returned back to its original blank piece of white paper, its impossible for me.it takes time.i might be happy that all the dread we have been through is over..i am sure u are twice more free mentally and emotionaly and i am happy for u for that .. but sometimes, i will feel sad and cry like nobody's business (haha forget my ego, i admit i did) but maybe thats not because i still want everything to be back as normal or i regretted the decision and all the dreadful stuff we have been through, no its not like that..ITS because i am once in a while still haunted by our happy memories throughout that one year..we have been through many things ..happy nor sad..THANK YOU SO MUCH for giving me all these happy memories all this while..we both agreed that what we have been through is as though we have been through it for MORE than just a year..haha

i just wanna let u know that i never regretted the time i have spent with u, u have done ur best and done it very well indeed..and i also wanted to apologize deeply for the pain i have caused u..i am so sorry..however evrything is over now =)

I bet u have heard of the saying "sometimes certain stuff are better left unknown" ..hence sometimes i wonder , if i have not been told by U bout that thing..maybe things might have run more smoothly for us eh? haha but however, i truly truly appreciate ur honesty and i know its because u loved (used to, Lol) me only did u not hide anything from me..THANK you so much for that, but i am very sorry..truly sorry that things end up not the way we wanted it..in the end i still ended up not being able to accept it..i am so sorry ..=(

During the time we were together, perhaps ur friends might have thought of us for being "unmixable' but to me, i think that they just don know yet the pain we have been through that time and i just wanna say sorry for that misunderstanding..after this thing is over i truly pray that ur friends will be there for u back and thank god, u r back for them and they are back for u..
>>However when i see the comments of ur frens saying u r back and U saying u r back, it bothers me a bit..it makes me wonder whether have i ever stopped u from mixing with ur friends when we were together or have i ever LOCKED u up in a "cell" all this while that forbids u to connect with the outside world eh? LOL..well..NO!! but maybe i think too much again..haha

there is nothing much left to say or mingle about,..in the end i just wanna make a conclusion to our previous chapter of life by saying a big THANK YOU for what u have done for me, and a big SORRY for the pain we have been through..=)

and say CHEERS to our new chapter of life =)) take care ~~~

~The End~
~ but an ending is always the beginning of someting new ~ =)

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